What the fitness experts want you to know…

November 1, 2020November 2, 2020Leave a comment

It’s time for me-time this month, and here’s some sound expert advice to help get you moving for better health and fitness.

Sometimes, becoming fit and healthy is easier said than done – and for many, seems like an insurmountable challenge in their life. According to the World Health Organization, obesity has more than doubled since 1980 and in 2014, more than 1.9-billion adults were overweight. One of the best ways to avoid becoming a statistic is prioritise your health and wellness, which encompasses better nutrition, more movement and improving your fitness levels. Charlene Yared-West speaks to the experts to find out more about what you should and shouldn’t be doing to get fit – and stay fit.

Just move!

Movement can happen in the gym or it can be tickle fights, sex, a walk on the beach, playing sport and anything that gets you moving, explains Dr Greg Venning, author and chiropractor at Peak Chiropractic in Cape Town (capetownchiro.com). “Fitness has at least ten different components to it and human beings do best when they have competence in each of these ten. They are; strength, speed, endurance, stamina, power, accuracy, mobility, co-ordination, balance and agility,” he says. “How each person archives these is going to be personalised, as there is no single path to fitness. Find the things you love and approach them playfully and practice them for mastery. That will accelerate your short-term results as well and give you long-term staying power.” Adele Pudney, physiotherapist from ADK Physio & Hydrotherapy (wellspringcentre.co.za) agrees. “You must learn to love yourself and the movement you’re doing to be successful in maintaining your exercise goals. Be kind to yourself and reward yourself for small improvements,” she says. “See it as a journey; there will be times of great enthusiasm and other moments of total disinterest – and have ways to cope with both ends of the spectrum.”

Movement for health

“Quit exercise. Workouts suck. Practice and play with movement and rediscover the joy in it,” says Dr Venning. He recommends moving for at least five minutes a day, which, as you start to enjoy the movement, will expand over time. “You require three types of movement for health; move moderately everyday, move heavy things one to three times a week and move fast, one to two times a week. Avoid long, repetitive cardio workouts, they aren’t as good for you as you think,” says Dr Venning. Zeno Rossouw, physiotherapist based at Life Orthopaedic Hospital at Vincent Pallotti agrees and points out that 30 minutes of daily exercise can reduce both weight and BMI almost as much as a 60 minute workout. “Be time efficient and rethink the value of a warm up. It is crucial to prepare your muscles for the activity they are about to endure,” he says. “It also helps to choose an exercise that will keep your mind guessing, like cross training. Each new and different workout can target different muscle groups, which reduce the risk of injury, boost energy levels and keep boredom at bay.” Dr Venning adds that a short duration (less than 20 minutes) of high intensity intermittent training can help you to get all the benefits of cardio in a fraction of the time. “Avoid moving weights around if you can’t move your own body weight around well. Start small and do something you enjoy doing,” he says.

Are there shortcuts to fitness freedom?

The experts concur: there is no easy way – and no shortcuts, but you can still have fun anyway!Liesl Way, physiotherapist at Life Westville Hospital says that consistency and discipline are key in the beginning of your path to fitness. “Start with simple activities that you enjoy and realise that fitness is built over time – and not overnight, so don’t binge exercise. Doing so will make you lose your motivation and possibly cause injury – and you will feel awful (physically and emotionally) if you exercise beyond your current fitness level,” she says. Exercise creates opportunity to meet new people, it leads to a sense of well being, can combat feelings of depression, increases energy levels, can reduce insomnia and can be a very enjoyable part of your day, adds Liesl.

<SIDEBAR> What you should be avoiding on your journey to fitness?Having a cheat meal after a good workout.Procrastinating when to start your routine.Focusing on the end goal. It becomes overwhelming and prevents us from moving forward.Making excuses as to why you shouldn’t workout.Setting unrealistic goals and time frames.Continuing with an unhealthy diet. A balanced, healthy diet is important for joint and muscle health.Starving yourself in an attempt to speed up the weight loss.Ignoring the value of adequate rest and stretching before and after exercise.

<SIDEBAR> Top tips for getting fitStart small and make steady daily improvements.Use positive and realistic affirmations and pictures to motivate yourself.Take part in outdoor exercise … Fresh air, scenery like a trail run or mountainbiking can boost your energy levels.Tracking your activity is also a very useful exercise, whether it’s a fitness diary or a high-tech app on your smartphone.Grab a workout partner, but also someone that will challenge you and thereby increase how long and hard you workout.Enlisting the help of a personal trainer could help to motivate you. They can supervise and ensure that your technique is flawless preventing injuries and ensuring good results.Nutrition has a major role to play, as people have heard that the six pack is made in the kitchen and not at the gym. People should consider keeping a food diary to track how certain meals impact their performance.Sleep is also a vital aspect of a healthy balanced lifestyle. Ensuring that we have between 6-8 hours will also help boost our fitness levels. A post workout cool down can leave the individual with the notion that the workout wasn’t as tough as they originally expected. A better mindset for getting back to the gym the next day. Performing static stretches whereby a 20-30 second hold is best.Love yourself enough to take care of yourself.

Pregnancy and Diabetes

November 1, 2020November 2, 2020Leave a comment

Have you been diagnosed with gestational diabetes? While that might sound overwhelming at first, it turns out the condition is more common than you may think. / Recent studies indicate that gestational diabetes is on the rise. How can you protect yourself and your baby during pregnancy from this condition?

Gestational diabetes only happens during pregnancy and affects about three to five out of every 100 pregnant women. Even women who have not have diabetes before can experience gestational diabetes in pregnancy. So, what are the risks and how can they be overcome to ensure a healthy mom and baby throughout the nine months of pregnancy? Charlene Yared-West speaks to Dr Bandile Masuku and Dr Gaontebale Matlhaga, two obstetrician/gynaecologists from Life Suikerbosrand.

What causes gestational diabetes?

Pregnancy can affect the normal way a woman’s body processes sugar. In normal circumstances, explains Dr Gaontebale Matlhaga, obstetrician/gynaecologist from Life Suikerbosrand, food is ingested and digested and glucose from the food enters the bloodstream. “In response to this increase of sugar in the blood, the pancreas releases the hormone insulin, which helps to move the sugars from your bloodstream and into your body’s cells, where it is used as energy,” he says. “In pregnancy however, the placenta produces pregnancy hormones, which impair the action of insulin, which automatically then raises the blood sugar levels.” As your pregnancy progresses and your baby grows, the placenta, he says, produces even more insulin-blocking hormones, which create a cycle of increased blood sugar levels. He adds that the condition is most common from around 20 weeks of pregnancy, but generally not earlier than that. “It isn’t always easy to notice signs or symptoms – which are non-specific and so it is usually picked up in the urine test, which is then followed up with a fasting blood test to ascertain if the woman has this condition,” he says.

<Sidebar> What are the different types of Diabetes Mellitus?
Diabetes mellitus, otherwise known as diabetes is a metabolic condition where there are uncontrolled high blood sugar levels over a long period of time. Symptoms can include increased hunger and thirst, as well as frequent urination.

Type 1 Diabetes: An autoimmune disease, where the pancreas produces very little or no insulin at all. It is most common in people under the age of 20.

Type 2 Diabetes: A disease found in people who are overweight as they get older, where the pancrease does not produce enough insulin, or the body does not use it properly. It can be considered a lifestyle disease which is usually triggered by little or no exercise and being overweight.

Type 3 Diabetes: A condition otherwise known as gestational diabetes, which occurs in pregnancy.

<Sidebar>Who is at risk of gestational diabetes?

Women older than 25 years of age are more prone to metabolic conditions.
Women with polycystic ovary syndrome.
Family or personal history and pre-pregnancy diabetes.
Women with a body mass index of 30 or higher.
Women who are black, of indian origin or Asian are more likely to develop gestational diabetes.

What are the complications of developing gestational diabetes?

If left undiagnosed, the complications for mother and baby can be dire, explains Dr Bandile Masuku, obstetrician/gynaecologist from Life Suikerbosrand. “Babies are born with a high birth weight, because of the extra glucose in the bloodstream, which crosses the placenta and triggers the baby’s own pancreas to make extra insulin – and this causes the growth rate to speed up. As a result, many of these babies with this condition known as macrosomia, are born via Caesarean because of their size,” he says. “Preterm labour is also a risk, which also means that the baby’s lungs are not fully developed and the baby will not be able to breathe on its own. In addition, babies can also develop low blood sugar, because their insulin production is so high, which can also lead to seizures. As a result the blood sugar levels in the baby must be closely monitored after birth to help normalise the baby’s blood sugar level. Babies of mothers who have gestational diabetes also have an increased risk of developing obesity and type 2 diabetes later in life,” Dr Masuku adds gestational diabetes can also increase the risk of high blood pressure and preeclampsia, which are also dangerous to mother and baby. Furthermore, women with gestational diabetes also often develop future diabetes; whether in a future pregnancy or type 2 diabetes later in life.

Why is it challenging to fall pregnant when you have diabetes?

Women suffering from Type 1 or Type 2 diabetes usually face challenges when trying to fall pregnant as the “conception environment” can be compromised, explains Dr Matlhago. Type 1 Diabetes sufferers also tend to have higher incidences of miscarriage or have a baby born with a birth defect. In a healthy person, food is digested with the help of the hormone insulin – and in diabetics, there are flaws in this metabolism system. Hormones and hormone production are an essential part of the reproductive process – especially for a person wanting to conceive – and diabetics have a compromised system of hormonal control. “In addition, diabetic men may also want to consult their doctor about problems that can arise such as erectile dysfunction and damaged nerves, which can cause the sperm to enter the bladder during ejaculation,” he adds.

Getting ready for pregnancy: Consult your ob/gyn

“It would be beneficial for all women who want to fall pregnant to see their obstetrician/gynaecologists before conception, for counselling and to develop a plan – especially if they have diabetes as an existing condition. It is important for all women to gain control of their blood sugar levels before pregnancy, which can also help to avoid the onset of gestational diabetes,” says Dr Masuku. “It is also more challenging for women who have pre-existing diabetes to fall pregnant, so a consultation can help to see where the problem is and also to create a programme, which includes dietary advice and exercise guidelines. It even helps if a woman can lose extra weight before conception to also help achieve a healthier pregnancy and lower her chances of getting gestational diabetes.”

Managing gestational diabetes

According to Dr Masuku, it can be psychologically challenging and inconvenient to be diagnosed with gestational diabetes, because of the lifestyle and dietary changes that come with the treatment strategy. “Daily checking of the sugar levels, before and after meals is necessary to make sure the levels are within a healthy range,” he says. “In addition, eating the right kinds of food in healthy portions is one of the best ways to control the sugar levels and help to avoid weight gain. Exercise also plays an important role and can help lower your blood sugar by encouraging your body to move glucose into your cells where it will be burned for energy – and less insulin will be necessary.” He adds that if diet and exercise are not impacting your sugar level, medication might be necessary, which is assessed on an individual basis. “Medication in the form of oral drugs and injectible insulin might be necessary to control the condition.”

<Case Study>Millicent Ndlovu

“I was 30 weeks pregnant, on the highway and driving to work one winter’s morning in June, when I suddenly felt extremely hot, so I opened the car window and then felt terribly nauseous. I started vomiting and moved over into the slow lane. Luckily I was close to the office, but the nausea wouldn’t go away and I started vomiting some more. My colleague took me to hospital, where I was kept for observation. They measured my sugar levels and they were exceedingly high and wouldn’t go to normal levels even that evening when the levels were taken again. It was decided to put me on insulin, which brought my levels back to normal. I also had to speak to a dietician who advised me on diet and exercise. Diabetes is hereditary in my family; both my parents and sister have it, but I did not – and I thought I was having a healthy pregnancy; no morning sickness or nausea, I only had fatigue. It was very frustrating for me to have this condition and of course I was worried about the health of my baby too. Thankfully, through diet and injectible insulin I controlled my sugar levels well and my 4.5kg baby girl, Humelelani was born on July 22, last year, via caesarean section. The gestational diabetes cleared after I had given birth, but after a health screening at work about a year later, it was determined that I had diabetes type 1, which I now manage with medication and a strict diet.”

Ruwarashe’s Birth Story

August 30, 2020August 30, 2020Leave a comment

Ruwa was nervous at our first meeting. Soft-spoken, she asked about my role as a doula for her birth. I walked with her in pregnancy and birth and when she went into labour, I met her at the hospital. Her birth changed everything. She was shown how powerful her birthing body was and that she could do anything. Here is her story of the birth of her son…

My name is Ruwarashe and I am 21-years-old and I come from Zimbabwe. I’m currently studying at UCT. I became pregnant in September 2018. Pregnancy was going to be a hard journey for me, as I didn’t understand anything about birth and even worse, I was a long way from home where I had friends and family to guide and support me. In Cape Town, I have little support. So many people recommended I get a doula, especially since I felt quite isolated in Cape Town without my family near.

Choosing a doula for me was so important, because I needed someone compassionate and soft and when I went onto Charlene’s website, I knew she was the doula who would understand my fear and confusion of becoming a mother. ( I hadn’t even met her in person yet, but I just knew.)

I remember I wasn’t sure if I was going to have anyone close to me at my birth, because my family and fiancé stayed so far away… And I had so many fears of becoming a new Student mom. Charlene reminded me that she was going to be there for me – and that I would be ok, no matter what turn it took. She said this at our first meeting.

Charlene engaged with me every week reminding me to trust the process of the journey I was on, offering me her kind support along the way. I was at school from 8am to 5pm everyday and I was at school until I was 9 months pregnant.

She also made sure we were able to meet close by to where I lived, as I did not have a car. She did this without hesitation – and it was so kind of her. When I felt low, I would message her and we would chat and she would encourage me to keep my faith and to be strong.
I think what especially helped were the Relax Into Birth visualisation tracks. Listening to them regularly helped me realise that birth wasn’t just an event, it was a process – a beautiful process… Finally I was learning to trust the process – and trusting myself to do it! I felt strong enough to birth my baby boy. The strength seemed to come from within me. A deep knowing.

The Relax Into Birth classes made me realise I wasn’t just doing a duty a woman is required to do; no! My body was giving life to a soul, another human being. Although it was about birth, it also somehow helped me establish what type of mom I was going to be to my little boy.

When I finally went into labour, the emotional support for me and my fiancé was tremendous! She always made sure I was as comfortable as I could be in those circumstances. When it was time for me to deliver, I remember I was very tired – and our doula Charlene never once wavered, always trying ways to help energise me and encourage me to bring my son down to earth.

During my visits to the doctor, I was told we had to schedule an induction, because they didn’t want me going over my due date, which was the 26th of May. I wasn’t so sure I wanted an induction considering the potential complications. It was really not what I wanted.

In my 39th week, I went for cervix check to prepare for my induction. I was notified that soon I was going to be in labour – and that it was likely I would not need an induction. On Thursday 23 May, my waters broke as I was going to bed. I remember I kept my calm. I took an Uber with my fiance who had arrived from Zimbabwe, even though my contractions hadn’t kicked in properly yet. I didn’t want to stay at home after that because I didn’t want to be under pressure to rush to the hospital when it became necessary. I didn’t want something dramatic! Charlene did join us at the hospital when my contractions got regular and intense. She was there the whole time and I held onto her. She created such a calming environment in such a tense situation. I remember I had moved 1 cm in 4 hours and all I wanted was an epidural. I asked the nurses for an epidural, but was refused by them, saying it was too early to administer. In the face of that, my doula encouraged me to keep going and to stay strong as I was birthing my angel.

We used other forms of natural pain relief. We used the shower and we counted together and breathed together and finally at 7 am they decided to insert a dose of prostaglandin gel to help my cervix open. Once that was given to me, five minutes later I was standing to go poo in the toilet and another five minutes later I was walking myself to the tub in the delivery room. During that walk I definitely felt my baby was coming! I got into the tub for a few minutes and notified both my fiancé and Charlene that the baby was indeed coming.

The delivery room not prepared by the hospital staff (as they didn’t expect me to push so soon), they quickly put me on the bed, and there was my baby crowning! They quickly set up the room as I involuntarily pushed him out. A few pushes and I had birthed my baby.

My birth taught me to trust my body and trust my baby. I have never felt as strong or as empowered as I did in those first days. I was blessed to have such a positive, empowered birthing.

Pip’s Birth Story

August 30, 2020August 30, 2020Leave a comment

Hailing from New Zealand, I had never met Pip in person, but she was referred to the Relax Into Birth Hypnobirthing course by a dear South African friend of hers, who had also completed the course a few years earlier. She was so excited to share her story with me after she had given birth, because the techniques had been so helpful. Here is her letter to me after her birth.

Dear Charlene,
I just wanted to give you an update on how I have been doing and let you know our little baby girl “Niamh” arrived safely with us in hospital at 10.07am on the 8th May 2020 at 6 Ib 15 oz and we are all doing great! I am sorry I haven’t been in contact sooner – I just wanted to sit down when I had some time to fill you in properly. I have emailed you because if I sent you a voice over on whats app I would be in tears!

Just to give you some background on myself, I had extreme anxiety about labour for as long as I can remember and this soon got worse when I became pregnant. To give you an example I had previously passed out from getting cervical smears done and I am just not good with that kind of stuff! – ironic really considering I am a horse vet!

You couldn’t have come at a better time for me as the anxiety was getting the better of me as time progressed. I remember around 26 weeks in tears at my midwife appointment feeling completely overwhelmed and not knowing what to expect. I spoke to my dear friend Felicity Meek who put me in touch with you. As soon as I started listening to your affirmations and then doing your course from around 33 weeks my mind set started to change and I began to relax ! Your course allowed me to understand the process but in a way that wasn’t scary but beautiful, something to look forward and that my body was going to do it! I had no idea how powerful hypnobirthing could be but it was the best thing I could have done to prepare myself ! I can not thank you enough Charlene – you are incredible and what an amazing birthing experience you and your course have given me.

Now for the gorey details………… well there aren’t any! Haha! I went into latent labour on the 4th May ( my due date) with mild contractions every 10-20 mins for about 20 seconds in length on / off through to the 7th May when the contractions gradually got stronger and longer. I had a “Show” over this time too which I admit did freak me out a bit but I had your voice saying “Show time!” in my head which helped to ground me and stop me panicking.
I laboured at home for as long as possible and made a wonderful area in my sitting room with candles, diffuser with lavender oil, exercise ball, cushions, fairy lights etc …. with my husband, 2 dogs and my favourite movies on.

It was really beautiful and my husband was absolutely amazing using some of your massage techniques on my lower back and making sure I was eating/drinking. I used a water colour painting of a lotus flower to remember your affirmations and a colour card to look at to help me focus on the rainbow breathing technique. During contractions I would also think about your lovely knitted uterus which helped me visualise and understand what mine was doing!

By the 7th May from 6pm the contractions got stronger and lasted longer until I was getting contractions every 3-4 minutes lasting a minute by midnight – I was in/out of the bath at this point which helped a lot.

We made our way to the hospital at this point and got screened at the entrance for COVID-19. We entered the maternity ward and the corridors were lined with pastel balloons and fairy lights which was wonderful! I was examined (I was apprehensive about the examination) and found to be 8 cm dilated. My waters broke at this point – I was delighted thinking ” not long to go now!”

I went into a bath and my husband and midwife set up some led candles and my affirmation cards. I stayed in the bath from about 2 am to 6 am . I was examined a few times and found to be 10 cm by 4 am but my contractions started to get weaker and further apart. I got out of the bath and tried sitting on a squatting stool but that didn’t really bring things on.

Up to this point everything was 100 % perfect but I started to feel anxious and willing for more intense contractions! I was examined by an Obstetrician at 6.30 am – he was astounded that I had no pain relief and I remember the midwife saying proudly “she’s using hypnobirthing!” The obstetrician confirmed with the midwife that all was well with baby and there was no reason why she shouldn’t come through my pelvis.

It was discussed with me to go on a Pitocin drip to get contractions going. My platelets were low so it was not recommended to have an epidural, but I remember feeling so exhausted and the thought of pain relief sounded good! Your affirmations grounded me through this process and helped me focus and I just continued to breath, eyes closed and I just went into myself. Once the drip was in and monitor put on baby head I was allowed go on 4’s on the bed. The contractions came – I took gas as I found them heaps stronger than my own ones but I could tell we were making great progress. I remember feeling my baby head turn and pop through my cervix. An incredibly visceral and alive feeling I had – I think I shouted out “Fecking hell!!!” and “How close are we now?”

Then I felt the wee burn feeling and I remember thinking “We are nearly there!” My midwife got me on my back at this point, one of my legs was wrapped around her neck. I couldn’t believe how much pushing I had to do along with the contractions. She got me to really push with my breath. At this point I remember taps going on and her telling me try not to push at the moment. She was putting hot flannels on me. Then the last contraction came and she warned me she may give me an episiotomy (I didn’t care at that point !) but she didn’t have to in the end and Niamh’s head came out followed shortly by the rest of her and up she went onto my chest – total magic!!!

My husband Josh cut the cord and she stayed on my chest for an hour. I got a small superficial tear that was stitched (about an inch or so long), but that was it. I passed the afterbirth and I remember the umbilical cord some how slid up between my bum cheeks and I said “Guys – the cord is giving me a wedgey!” , then I proceeded to wiggle around on the bed trying to pull it out.

I walked out of the delivery room an hour later feeling completely elated and so proud of myself. I had a beautiful and empowering birth experience and when one of my fears of having interventions occurred I was able to process and deal with it thanks to you and your course.

So Charlene, I can not thank you enough. Every first time mum should be doing this as it has honestly helped me beyond belief. I really think it should be offered to all expectant mums at their first midwife/doctors appointment. A huge thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Love from Pip.

Want to find out more about Relax Into Birth Hypnobirthing? Enjoy a more comfortable, empowered birth and click below to enroll and find out more. Relax Into Birth is an Online Birth Preparation Course, of international standard, teaching women and their partners Hypnobirthing techniques and deep relaxation methods for a more comfortable and manageable birth experience at home or at hospital, for natural or caeasarean birth.

click here to find out more and enroll
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Tamlyn’s Birth Story

August 30, 2020April 17, 2022Leave a comment

What a pleasure to be Tamlyn’s birth doula. From the moment I met her quite early in her pregnancy, she embodied a certain positivity and exuded a confidence I rarely saw in a first time pregnant mama. She shares her story of trusting the process for her home birth.

I’m a new Mamma, my baby boy Charlie is 4 months old. I’m just starting to emerge from my cocoon of love and bonding, embracing a new way of being and living, finding balance between motherhood and my purpose of serving you. What an incredible journey I’ve been on, from the start of my pregnancy to today, it’s been life changing on so many levels and I am looking forward to sharing it with you.

It all started on the 8^th of March at 2.30am when I woke up to a pop, and my waters releasing. I couldn’t believe it was the start of the journey to meet my baby boy. I wanted a natural, intervention free home birth, I was excited and had no idea how things would unfold but had a deep trust that things would happen as they should, a trust and surrendering I’d spent several months cultivating during my pregnancy.

I spent the months leading to my baby’s birth doing the work to birth a new part of myself, a mother. I meditated, visualised, went to healers, coaches and massage therapists, did family constellations work, hypnobirthing, re-created my own birth, did inner child work, went on yoga retreats, painted, walked, prayed and wrote every day. I learned so much. (I have many pregnancy and birth related resources if anyone would like them, please just reply and ask. )

I knew that my pregnancy and birth would have a deep impact on me and my baby and I wanted to go as natural as possible. I had many fears and doubts and whenever they would show up, I would go within and do the work to release them. I’d remind myself to pray for the highest good for all, to let go of control and to remain open to what life would present.

The work for me here was about letting go of the outcome, of control, and also not putting it in the hands of someone else, but to lean in, trust myself, my body, my baby and nature. This was a pattern I’d been playing on repeat most of my life, forever trying to control the outcome of situations or just putting my head in the sand and letting someone else take over. This was my biggest test yet. This time I really wanted to be intentionally conscious of what I wanted to co-create and at the same time know that whatever the outcome, to remain open to what life was offering.

For this reason, I chose my midwives and Charlene Yared-West from Relax Into Birth as my Doula. The moment I met with them, it felt right, very natural and mother and baby-led. I met Charlene at the The Birth Hub Antenatal classes and just loved her segment and felt so comfortable with her. I would highly recommend Charlene as a Doula, I couldn’t have done it without her. Throughout my pregnancy I formed such a beautiful bond with them all and I felt so safe and held with them as my birth team.

So, back to my birth story…

After my waters released, I had very mild intermittent rushes which were not painful at all so I tried to sleep and in the morning I let my midwives know that things could be happening soon. I spent the day painting, watching funny shows and walking in nature to ground myself. I let go of trying to predict what was happening and allowed myself to fold into the experience. I remember thinking to myself, this is easy, I’ve got this. The mild rushes continued on throughout the day and evening and at 10pm that night I told my midwives things were still the same and would get in touch in the morning. As I snuggled up to go to sleep, a strong surge rushed through my body, so strong I had to get on my knees.

A few minutes later, another, I knew it was time. I told Matt to let my midwives and doula that things were progressing. I moved to my birth room where we’d set up the birth pool, affirmations, playlist and positive imagery. I knew now was the time to get out of the way, to let go and let my body and my baby do the work. I instinctively knelt on the floor in the corner of the room on my knees, my upper body resting on my ball. I focused on spiralling my hips and moving back and forth to help the baby move down. The room was dark and quiet and all I could hear was the beautiful kundalini music from my birth playlist which helped me go within.

The surges were coming in heavier and faster now and I was struggling to breathe through them. It was so intense so quickly. (My midwives later told me, I must have had a very good production of Oxytocin as things progressed very quickly in my active labour.) I was beginning to get more and more vocal, my groans and primal sounds getting louder and louder. Matt was sitting with me encouraging me gently, holding my hand which I was using to bear down on with each rush. At about midnight my Doula, Charlene arrived, I was so grateful to see her. By then I didn’t want to speak and was so focused on the surges. She knew exactly what to do to support me. I held her hand she began massaging my lower back which felt so good.

In the meantime, Matt was preparing the birth pool. After a few hours of intense surges, I asked Charlene when she thought I would have my baby, she said soon soon, before the morning which encouraged me. I asked to move into the pool as the rushes were starting to feel unbearable. The moment I slid into the water it was a beautiful relief. It was so warm and took a lot of pressure off my back. However, when the next rush came, I’d forgotten all about the lovely water and roared through the rush. Nature had chosen wild and windy night for my birth which matched exactly what I was going through.

I spent the rest of my labour in the birth pool, on my knees spiralling back and forth while resting my head on the edge of the pool. For each surge I needed to hold someone’s hand, I needed something to push down on, something strong. My doula and Matt stayed by my side for most of my labour alternating for breaks. Giving me water, apple juice and honey to keep up my strength. Charlene let the midwives know when they needed to come and they arrived around 2am, a few hours before my birth. I was hoping they could tell me how close. I asked my midwife, how much longer, and she said ‘’let’s wait and see’’, this was not what I wanted to hear. I wanted her to say any minute now. I had chosen my midwives because they were very trusting in natural birth and in my body to birth my baby, with as little interference as possible however in that moment I wanted answers, my mind wanted to know the outcome, how much longer…! I knew they were doing exactly what they needed to do. I went within and let go.

I had no physical checks during my labour, my midwives spent most of my labour in the other room listening to my labour and doing the occasional listen to my baby’s heart rate which remained steady throughout. My dog Zesa popped into the room a few times wondering what all the noise was about which made me smile to know he was there for me too.

As time went on, I was getting more tired, I really needed him to be close now. My doula Charlene asked Matt what his name was, Matt said we hadn’t decided yet (which we had but he didn’t want to say). She said, if you knew his name you could call him and encourage him out. When I heard that I shouted CHARLIEEEEEE, and they both started laughing, I guess we knew the name after all. I started talking to him, encouraging him, telling him how much he was loved and wanted and that it wasn’t long now. That really helped me. It gave me a new boost of will power and determination. It was like I knew his birth was near. What also helped me was Charlene reminding me to relax and let go of each surge, this really helped me rest in between without tension. She would say one down, one less to go. I could feel he was close now, I muscled up every bit of inner strength I had and focused intently on allowing the birth energy to move through me. I connected with the galaxies and imagined that energy spiralling through me, I knew I didn’t have to do anything, I just need to let go and allow. I looked up at my affirmations and read ‘’I feel the strength of all woman’’. I knew if millions of women had done this before me then so could I. I had no idea who was in the room, and what was happening behind me, I was one with my body and baby.

In my pregnancy I had also done a lot of work listening to Charlene’s Relax into Birth Tracks. In the labour I could hear her voice, saying those calming words over and over again, ‘’relax….open….peace…’’, reminding me to breath ‘’down and out’’.

The next rush brought a new sensation, an excruciating stinging and burning which was incredibly intense. I had read about this in many birth stories but experiencing it was a whole new story. I moaned to Charlene, ‘’IT’S STINGING’’. I remember the song playing at that exact time, ‘’The Power Is Here Now, By Alexia Chellun.

The words to this song were divine timing…

The power of love is here now
The power of now is here now
The power of you and me is here
To create magic on earth
Let the water wash away your tears
Let the fire burn away your fears
Let the wind blow into your life such faith and trust
Let the earth hold you, take care of you and nurture you

This song gave me the strength to get through the final few rushes. I didn’t need to be coached or told what to do. I just listened to my body and my baby. The body truly is built to show you how to birth your baby if you trust it and let it show you the way. Just like in life, you are always being guided, are you listening to that inner guidance.

Finally, after an intense surge, and a crazy burning and stinging sensations, my baby’s head came out, and immediate relief came flooding through me, this was it. I then had to stand up and get out of the birth pool and and gave one almighty push and Charlie was born at 4.25am on Monday 9^th March weighing 3.92kgs. He slid out into my midwife’s arms. I remember her saying, hello baby, hello baby and rubbing his chest. Charlie was born to the song, Grace of God by Gurunam Singh. It was a special synchronicity that out of my entire playlist Charlie was born to two of my favourite songs and that they came on in the perfect time when I needed them most.

My midwife Lana and Doula Charlene helped me to lay back on the bed and passed my little baby Charlie to me. Matt was by my side through it all. I was completely exhausted and overcome with relief that it was over, and awe that my little man, baby G was finally here. Tears welled in my eyes as held him skin to skin and spoke softly to him. I had done it, we had done it, I had given birth just as I had intended to, at home, naturally, surrounded by love and all was well.

The next few hours were pure bliss. Charlie never left my chest and Matt and I cuddled up in bed and just gazed at him and studied his tiny body. My midwives and doula were incredible, they made our morning even more special. They tidied up around us, brought us tea and left us to bond for a few hours until everyone had had some rest. A few hours later my midwives did all his checks while he lay on Matts chest. I cut the cord and saved my placenta to bury one special day. The next few days were just as incredible getting to know this little soul. He was feeding well, sleeping well and I was in good hands with my midwives coming back every day to check up on us. It couldn’t have been a better first week. I felt so grateful to be a mum and was loving every moment of it. Charlene also came back the week after and gave me the most beautiful foot massage, I felt so taken care of.

Although my birth was pretty close to my dream birth. It wasn’t what I expected. I thought I would breath him out in a blissful meditation. It was way more painful and intense than I ever expected. I could see how woman in hospital would end up with interventions and pain medication and I was just grateful that I was at home and none of that was available. It was just me and my baby working together.

My midwives gave me homeopathic remedies including calendula and seaweed to help with the minor stitches. Charlene made me some beautiful bath salts to soak in. It took me a few weeks to get my energy and strength back, but I am grateful I never had any baby blues or any baby problems. While I was tired, I woke up each day feeling sunshine in my heart so happy to see my little baby. He spent the first week in our bedroom and we didn’t leave home for 40 days. We had minimal visitors, (thanks to Covid-19) and spent our days sleeping, relaxing, singing and getting to know each other. I massaged him daily and he got daily skin to skin and sunshine. We bonded deeply with him and both had the best possible start to our new journey together.

Charlie is now 4 months and thriving. He’s happy, calm, sleeps and feeds well, we’ve never had any issues. I’m so grateful he was born just before lock down, I’m grateful for the bubble it gave us. Just Charlie, Matt, my mum and me. My mum was supposed to be here 3 weeks and ended up being here 4 months, which again was divine planning. I don’t think we could have asked for a better start.

I am incredibly grateful to my birth team. My midwives and Lana who joined on the day and my Doula Charlene. I couldn’t have done it without them. The space they held with me throughout my pregnancy, birth and the days and weeks that followed made this the most incredible experience for me. Their encouragement and trusting approach is what gave me the trust and faith to birth my baby and to be the mum I knew I could be.

I am grateful to Matt for being a non-judgemental support through it all. His help doing everything else allowed me to focus on what I needed to do. We were also so lucky that he got to work from home and still is for this first part of Charlie’s life.

I am grateful to my mum for the 4 months of being here throughout lockdown, her early morning time with Charlie helped me catch up on my sleep, her cooking, cleaning and care, really helped us thrive during these first few months.

I am grateful to my baby Charlie, for being the gift of love and grace that he is. Thank you Charlie for choosing us. We love you.

Thank you for reading my birth story and for joining me on this life-changing journey. A new chapter has begun in my life and I look forward to sharing many more lessons and learnings along the way in the hope that they will too inspire you to live your happiest life.

Petra’s Birth Story

August 30, 2020September 3, 2020Leave a comment

Petra is a very strong mama who I met when she was pregnant with her first baby. Firm and determined, she never gave up all through her two birth experiences. It was lovely getting to know her as a mama also living in the Valley and this is the story of her second birth, where she attempted a VBAC. Thank you Petra for sharing your story!

I met Charlene in 2015 while pregnant with our first. My husband and I attended her hypnobirthing antenatal course. We were very keen on a natural birth and even changed service providers from a doctor to a midwife after doing a lot of research and weighing up all our options.

Unfortunately, our baby had other plans and presented in Frank breech, which is a breech position with the legs extended straight up towards the head. We were told by our supporting gynae that there was no chance of a natural delivery, and so we ended up scheduling a c-section. Our baby had other plans again: I went into labour the night before the c-section date, and our daughter was born by emergency caesarean at 03:30 in the morning.

3 ½ years later we found out that we were expecting again and to our delight our gynae suggested a vbac without us even asking. We agreed that this would be our preferred birth option, provided that everything was favourable.

I have a deep desire inside of me to birth my babies, and not just be delivered of them, which is why I felt somewhat “left out” with the c-section birth of our first child. And this time around I was determined to make sure that this baby would not be positioned in breech!

The pregnancy progressed well, without any complications and our baby turned head down and stayed head down – I was so thrilled!

We decided to make contact with Charlene for a refresher course, and chose her as our doula, to ensure that we have someone by our side who knows her way around natural birth.

At this point I need to mention that I turned 43 about 5 weeks before the birth of this baby and, whilst I feel much younger than this, my gynae would not allow me to go over 40 weeks for possible age-related complications. This means we have a scheduled c-section booking in case I don’t go into labour by that time. He also tells us that I cannot be induced, because it is a vbac, but he can rupture membranes for me the day before the booking, which might induce labour. If that doesn’t work, then I will have to stay in hospital overnight and have the c-section the next morning.

Week 38 has me seeing a midwife for a stretch and sweep. She tells me that my cervix is 1-2cm dilated and my body is definitely preparing to go into labour. Yay!

Week 39 and my gynae does another stretch and sweep, telling my husband that our weekend plans might just be in jeopardy. Great! Monday comes without any signs of labour and the booked section day is Wednesday. Oh no! We have a final check-up with the gynae, and he tells me to check into hospital at 3pm the following day so he can attempt to start my labour by rupturing the membranes. This being a vbac, we also agree that if there is foetal distress at any stage or if I start bleeding (which can be a sign of uterine scar rupture) then we will change plan and do an emergency caesarean.

Tuesday 21 May – the day before our c-section booking
I wake up feeling calm. Too calm! Not a surge in sight. I chat to Charlene and she suggests that I ask the gynae if we can check in earlier, so that I have a better chance of not labouring through the night.

So there I am at 13h00 hooked up to the CTG, listening to Charlene’s birth affirmations and waiting to have my membranes ruptured.

The procedure is successful, my water breaks and an hour later labour has started, and I am having regular surges roughly 5 minutes apart.

My birth photographer is there and Charlene has also arrived, and worked her magic in the room, transforming it into a much friendlier place.

The surges quickly become more intense and very soon they are 2 minutes apart. Charlene and my husband take turns massaging my lower back through the surges, which is where I am feeling the most pressure.

I need to be hooked up to the CTG a lot and for this I have to lie down on the bed, which is much more uncomfortable that sitting on the birth ball or standing and swaying my hips through a surge.

At some stage I have to go to the toilet, which is outside of the labour room. It takes a lot of courage to venture out of the room and when I finally do, I take Charlene with me. I simply cannot bear to face a surge without someone by my side. (Which not-so-clever person designed these labour rooms and didn’t include a toilet..?!)

There is quite a bit of blood and we think it is a good show. As labour progresses, I can however feel that there is fluid leaking out at the end of every surge, and I assume that this is amniotic fluid.

At 17h00 my gynae comes to check up on me again, and notices that I am haemorrhaging. “Why is there so much blood?” I hear him asking the midwife. So that is the fluid that I feel at the end of every surge! He also checks the foetal monitor printout, and then comes to tell me that I am 7 cm dilated at this stage, but I am also bleeding, the foetal heart rate is declining, and he is not happy about either of this. Those are the 2 things that we agreed would mean a change in our birth plan.

A decision is made quickly and calmly that we will proceed with an emergency c-section. Both baby and I are fine at this stage and there is no panic. I keep breathing through my surges, still lying on the bed and connected to the CTG, while Charlene and my husband keep massaging my back.

At 17h40 my gynae comes back to take me into theatre and I am pleased to discover that the assisting doctor also assisted with my previous c-section, and the anaesthetist is the one we requested for our booking the following day – this helps to put me at ease even more.

Charlene once again works her magic and soon there is beautiful music playing in the theatre, which helps to create a light and calm atmosphere.

15 minutes later we’re ready to start the c-section and at 18h00 our baby is born! Because we didn’t want to find out the gender during the pregnancy, the gynae lifts the baby up for a gender reveal: it’s a girl!! My husband has tears in his eyes when he turns to me and says, “we have another girl!”.

I really try to be more present to all that is happening than I was with my previous c-section. The gynae tells me that my scar is fine and wasn’t the cause of the bleeding, and that he cannot see where the blood was coming from. We assume that it could have been from the placenta starting to detach and this confirms that a c-section was the right decision. The baby was also facing forward and that was causing my back labour.

Once the paed finishes his check-up, she is placed on my chest skin to skin and we get to cuddle a bit while we wait for the surgery to end. There is a happy atmosphere in the theatre with lots of smiles, we have a healthy baby girl and all is well!

Charlene accompanies us to our room and helps to get us all settled in before leaving hubby and me to bond with our little girl, who is breastfeeding like a pro and soon falls asleep right there on my chest.

The next day starts off well, I am up and able to take a shower. I feel fantastic, with hardly any pain at all thanks to the pain meds, and I am looking forward to our “big sister meets little sister” visit that afternoon.

It is truly one of the best moments of my life, watching my older daughter meet her younger sister, and our lovely birth photographer captures some amazing pictures for us. I love every moment of it, and in the excitement of it all, I get up far too often and move around far too much… by the time my husband leaves with our daughter, I am in a lot of pain and can hardly stand up straight. I am now very annoyed with myself, as this is not my first c-section and I should really know better than behaving like I have just done! I also need to empty my bladder but try as I may, I can’t go. It is just too painful!

The pain gets worse and eventually I am in complete agony with what feels like one large abdominal spasm, almost like a labour surge that peaks and never ends! A nurse comes to measure my blood pressure and temperature, telling me that both are raised – I get annoyed with her, because it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that all this pain is causing the raised measurements. At this stage the spasm pulls up on the right-hand side from my abdomen into my shoulder and I am desperately trying to find a comfortable position to lie in. I’m clinging on to the bed rail and moaning through the pain! Finally, after what seems like an eternity, my gynae comes to check on me. I am in tears and tell him that I think I might have torn something with all my movement earlier. I feel completely responsible and am so disappointed with myself, and I am in so much pain. He gives me a voltaren injection, the nurse reinserts a catheter and eventually the pain fades. I am able to have a fairly restful night.

The next morning my gynae pops in on his rounds and tells me, that he thinks my bladder might be punctured, and that I will need to go for a scan. Baby stays with the nurses while I head off to the radiologist. Not much later we have confirmation: my bladder is leaking and will need to be fixed.

At lunch time my gynae returns with the urologist, and together they assure me that this is not my fault and that nothing I did could have caused the bladder puncture. It must have happened during the c-section and gone unnoticed. Surgery is scheduled for 19h00 that evening. Until then I am not allowed to eat or drink anything… not great, as I trying to establish breastfeeding.

Later that afternoon I have another abdominal spasm with pain as bad as the day before, and this leaves me exhausted and more than willing to go back into theatre just 49hrs after having a c-section. My baby does an hour long feed and then falls asleep just before her daddy arrives to look after her, while I go in for surgery.

The urologist checks on me outside theatre, and once again assures me that it was not my fault and that he will fix my bladder for me shortly. I am tearful and sore, feeling very sorry for myself and heartbroken for being away from my 2 day old baby. A theatre nurse walks past and sees me lying there looking miserable. She stops to come and console me, stroking my hair and telling me not to worry, that all will be fine. Sometimes angels don’t have wings and wear scrubs instead.

Surgery takes an hour and much to my relief I really do wake up without any pain. After recovery I return to my room to find hubby sitting peacefully in the easy chair with a sleeping baby girl skin to skin on his chest. She slept through the entire thing!

I spend 6 days in hospital with 2 catheters and went home with the suprapubic catheter strapped to my leg with a “pee-pee bag” as my daughter called it. Not the most comfortable thing to have but at least I was mostly pain free. Charlene also came to visit me at home for a doula check and a long heavenly foot massage, where we talked and talked, and I had an opportunity to debrief.
The suprapubic catheter was removed after 11 days and I was mighty glad to be rid of it.

So in the end my deeply desired vbac turned into another emergency c-section. Not what I had hoped for but this whole birth experience taught me one thing: “Surrender, it is what it is.”

I kept on repeating that phrase to myself, and I also kept looking for the blessing in each situation:

I look at the photos of our daughter’s birth, I see myself during those few hours of labour, actively participating in the birthing process, and in the end, we had a calm and joy-filled c-section birth with lots of smiling faces.
I would never want to go through the pain of the abdominal spasms again, but I treasure the fact that my husband got to spend those hours bonding with his little girl, while I had to have another surgery. Precious time that he would probably not have had otherwise.

Hospitals are by no means a restful place, but I had 6 days alone with my baby, before we went home to a very excited 4-year-old sister.

I am at peace with the turn my birth took and Charlene sums this up beautifully in one of her poems:

Even when things go in the opposite way of what was intended.
It’s that most sacred of moments.
When she locks eyes with her babe for the first time…
Skin to skin now on her chest she lies.
“You must be mother. You are, this place – is my home.”
She holds her closer and adjusts her position to bring her closer to her breast.
The noise and voices and bustle of the hospital dim all around her…
Yet, she suckles… and the circle is complete.

Aimee’s Birth Story

August 30, 2020August 30, 2020Leave a comment

It was my honour to walk beside Aimee and Ryan for the birth of their baby girl Kenzy. Here is their story…

When I think back on my “Birth Day” it was nowhere near what I expected, despite all my reading and “scenario-planning.” And to be honest, I wasn’t convinced I needed a doula in the beginning. I went to the Relax into Birth workshop which was incredible and empowering. Then I listened to the tracks every single day, and after a month I’d realized something. Not only did I now want a doula, but I only wanted Charlene. I couldn’t actually imagine giving birth without her there. I didn’t know my water had broken on Saturday. It just felt like I’d wet my pants. On Monday a confirmation call for Tuesday’s gynae appointment became the green light to come into hospital *with my bags*… There was some urgency as it had been almost 40 hours since the water breaking and I hadn’t experienced any contractions. But the phone call was pleasant and relaxed; and when I hung up I had a little joyful cry and some reflective me-time while I waited for Ryan to come home.At the hospital, a litmus test for amniotic fluid was positive and the gynae started a Propess induction immediately. (According to my Birth Plan, I hadn’t wanted to be induced, but by then it had been 45 hours since my waters had broken, and I was completely at peace with it). I was told it would take a while, and we could just relax! Great! The baby would be coming that night or in the early hours of the morning (it was only 2pm at that point). We were excited, joyful, “floating”! So we started sending some messages to the family and we told Charlene that she could come in after the traffic died down.

Half an hour later, I was in agony and I couldn’t bear to lie down on my back. The baby’s heart rate was high. She was in distress – fetal tachycardia. The Propess was removed and I needed to have an emergency caesarean. My gynae was so kind, gentle and professional. She knew I had wanted to have a vaginal delivery, but we talked through the situation and I felt like we were always on the same page. Physically, it was agony, but emotionally I felt cared for and respected. I even felt quite content about going in for the surgery, knowing that my baby needed it. (We learned later, during the surgery, that it was all because her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck twice. I am so glad I trusted my doctor.)

Then it was a whirlwind to get prepped for surgery. Even though our time schedule had changed drastically, I was mostly just feeling excited to meet my baby. Charlene arrived just in time! I was relieved to hear her voice: the same calming voice I’d been listening to every day. She put on some beautiful music and came to massage my shoulders, which was just what I needed then because I started to really feel a lot of pain. It felt like I was being bullied internally, my organs being pushed and pulled. Tears were rolling down my face and I could hear myself groaning with every surgical touch. The pain was too much and I agreed to a general anesthetic. I know I was hyperventilating, but I felt Charlene’s firm grip around my shoulders and chest guiding me to breathe slowly while the gas was administered. Despite the intensity of it all, I felt safe. I closed my eyes and woke up to see my beautiful healthy baby 45 minutes later.

Five months later I filled in that missing 45 minutes. Charlene had captured the whole birth on video on my husband’s phone! It was such a gift.

Ryan and I hadn’t spoken through the “sedated-scenario” and by that stage he was quite traumatised by my pain. He was so worried about me that he didn’t even watch the birth; he just held my hand and kept watch over me. When Kenzy was born, he didn’t know what to do or expect. (And that was exactly why I had wanted a doula: Someone to be a guide for us both, to be on our “new parents” team, our coach.) Ryan was particularly grateful to Charlene for talking him through those first moments of our daughter’s life. A funny moment comes up in the video where we hear Charlene saying “take off your shirt” and Ryan looks so surpised! He thinks she’s joking. But because he listens, the nurse brings Kenzy to put on Dad’s chest right away for skin-to-skin. I bet she didn’t expect to get a mouth full of hair while looking for her first drink! He really cherishes that time he got to share with his daughter.

Ryan bonding with his baby girl for the first time

It was an unexpected arrival in most ways, but I am so grateful I was prepared for every surprise step. I praise the Lord for modern medicine and how swiftly and professionally the whole team worked!

Know your options dear mama!

June 27, 2019August 30, 2020Leave a comment

I was when I found out I was pregnant… I wanted a caesarean! I was so terrified of even the thought of birth. Then I educated myself, learnt the Hypnobirthing technique and then had a home waterbirth. I’m now a doula and teach Relax Into Birth and my whole life has changed since the birth of my son… His birth taught me so much; that my body is amazing, that women don’t have to fear birth, that women have options and should know about their options, that because I was now empowered I had to share that with others. Even though birth is the most intense thing you will ever endure – and will push you out of your comfort zone, YOU can do it. It is worth a try…. You never know until you’ve tried. Leave no room for questions or regret afterwards… Choose a Midwife, get a considerate pro-options/pronatural gynae and a doula and then if a Caesar is called at the end of it all you know it was a necessary one. 😘😘

The birth story of Relax Into Birth

September 19, 2018March 16, 20232 Comments

People often ask me how I came to be a doula and how Relax Into Birth was started. I always say it started with my son. Here is our birth story, for without Leonardo, I would never have birthed my programme.

180 turnaround: From elective caesarean in hospital to home birth with an independent midwife

228412_10150241778321061_7199639_n When I found out I was pregnant, the very first thought I had was; “I want a caesarean.” I know, it sounds crazy coming from a birthworker, a doula, an oxytocin junkie – but there it was. In my mind, there was no way my baby was coming out of there… I wanted to plan the day and be in control of when I had my baby. Also, that was how we had babies in my family; via caesarean. I was the first of four children, all born via caesarean. I was breech and stubborn even in utero, but I could not ignore the signs that came my way, derailing my plans of an elective caesarean.

The first sign: Two men telling me to have a vaginal birth

So, I told my husband, Jeremy about my plan of action: an intentional caesarean in hospital. He frowned a little… and said disapprovingly, “Charlene, millions of women have given birth before you – what is wrong with you? You have to try.” To say I was irritated is an understatement… And so, I tried my doctor, Doctor Douglas Dumbrill at Vincent Pallotti Hospital, surely he would listen? He said the same, only a bit different; “Charlene, if you want a caesarean, then you need to go to that hospital over there (motioning with his hands in a southerly direction). I will not just give you a caesarean without a medical reason.” He added that I should go home, think about it, do more research on the topic and come back with questions.

262311_10150296375601061_5773358_n Now, here were two men telling me to have a vaginal birth! And did they have vaginas they were willing to have a baby move through? No… I mean, what does a girl have to do to get a caesarean in this town? As I was to learn, not much! Dr Dumbrill’s response was incredibly rare – and I will be forever grateful to him, as my path would have never cumulated in the birthwork I now know and love.

Our caesarean rate in South Africa is reaching 90% in the private sector. This figure is frightening, considering that the WHO recommends only 15% for a country’s caesarean rate. I also learnt that our medical aid would not pay for a elective caesarean without a medical reason. So… somehow I had to get over myself – get over my fear of vaginal birth – and give it a go.

The second sign: Alzheimer’s and birth stories in Botswana

I laid the subject to rest for a while as we prepared to go on holiday to Botswana. There we stayed with Jeremy’s family, which included his Aunty Em, who was living with Alzheimer’s. My pregnant belly was showing and every time she saw it she would tell me the birth stories of her two sons, who are now in their fifties. She was living in the UK when she was pregnant and her gynaecologist was also a hypnotherapist.

She remembered doctor’s visits where apart from the checks on baby, he would help her prepare mentally through relaxation techniques and visualisations. She described their subsequent births as wonderful, empowering, relaxing and even painless experiences – “and if there was pain, I don’t remember it,” she said. She remembered that while in labour, near transition, her gynae guided her through a visualisation of being on a beach, while pushing her boys out. “And if he left the room and stopped talking, it would make my labour painful.”

She told me this story almost daily. She would see my belly, touch my belly, ask me how far along I was and if I was expecting a boy or a girl, and then launch into her birth stories, so that for the week that we stayed in Botswana it became a daily ritual. And after the third time of hearing this story, I knew there must be something to using hypnosis for birth and so when we got back to Cape Town, I googled the words hypnosis and birth and came across the term hypnobirthing, which I never even knew existed.

The third sign: Hypnobirthing course near home

Even more synchronous, was that there was a hypnobirthing course in my area and so, I enrolled and dragged my willing husband along with me. I gained so much from the course and it, it helped empower me with the information I needed to regain trust in my body, in my uterus and learnt that I could actually birth my baby vaginally, my body could actually do such a thing!

The fourth sign: Accosting my midwife outside her practice

The course set me on a path of investigating my options. I learnt that I could have a gynae-led birth at hospital under the care of hospital midwives, but that my gynae would only come at the end when I was pushing and not be there at all during my labour, except to check my dilation once in a while if it wasn’t an ungodly hour. Also, I couldn’t be sure which midwife would be on duty that day – a dragon or Mother Teresa; you could never be sure – and you’d get who was on the roster for that day or night or ungodly hour. I also learnt about the option of hiring independent midwives. In Cape Town we have only a handful of independent midwives and to get one for your birth you have to book yesterday already. They are able to attend homebirths with gynae or government hospital back-up, and also attend hospital births where they have permission to work.

I drove through to the Birth Options Midwifery Team practice and waited outside before it opened one morning. The first to arrive was Midwife Angela Wakeford, who was fumbling with keys to open the door, when I came up the path behind her, telling her I desperately needed to have a vaginal birth, because my medical aid wouldn’t pay for an elective caesarean without a medical reason and that I knew I needed an independent midwife to help me achieve that – all before she even opened the front door to the practice. She looked at me quizzically and motioned to the door and said, “Let me just open the door and then we can chat, ok?” I knew she would be my midwife… and she was, dear Angela Wakeford – and what and amazing midwife she is.

From elective caesarean section in hospital to a home waterbirth

We were still planning to have a hospital birth, but as the weeks of my pregnancy went by, I knew that I needed to be at home as it was a space that would be most conducive to my labour. I had learnt about fear and its impact on my uterus during labour – and I wanted to stay out of survival mode and away from fight, flight or freeze. I knew home would be my best bet. We chose to have a homebirth and hired a birth pool in case our baby was to be a waterbaby.

relaxingduringsurges On September 18, 2011 I felt odd. I knew our baby was close to arriving as it was one day before our official due date. I started having surges at 6pm that evening, just as Jeremy was going to gym. I knew I should tell him to stay, but thought it might be a false alarm, so instead I decided to wash the dishes. If it was labour starting, I couldn’t have the midwives come to an untidy flat! As the surges continued for the next forty minutes, I knew I needed to call him to come home. He didn’t answer his phone – as one does when your wife is in possible labour – and so I called the gym and they called him over the intercom; “Mr Jeremy West, please proceed to reception, your wife is in labour.”

I called Angela to tell her my labour had started and she told me to rest if I could and to stay in touch. Jeremy rushed home with one energy bar in hand for me and we started getting the place ready. We shuffled things around in the bedroom, lighting tea lights and the Himalayan salt lamp and inflating the birth pool. I spent some time on the birth ball, but just couldn’t get into a rhythm and so moved to the bathroom, where I lit another candle and sat myself down on the loo. At some point, around 21h30, Jeremy asked me to hold the hosepipe (which trailed from the kitchen sink into the bedroom) into the birth pool, so that it wouldn’t snake all over the room and wet everything. I asked if he was crazy – I was in labour! I could not move from here! I didn’t move from the loo and the hosepipe did snake through the room, wetting everything!

At about 22h00 things starting heating up and getting more intense and so Jeremy called and told the Angela things were moving and that she should start making her way to us. By 23h00 she arrived with trainee midwife, doula and homoeopath, Keryn White, who held my hand and told me I was doing beautifully. I remember her gentle voice, supportive hand and warm smile. Angela checked my dilation at half-past midnight and told me I was fully dilated and that if I wanted to, we could move to the pool to birth my baby there.

Arrival on his due date: Waterbirth at 02h24, 19 September 2011

fewminutesafterbirth Leonardo came swimming out into our lives after five hours of active labour at 02h24. I remember his face coming up out of the water towards me – eyes wide open, soft to to the touch, covered momentarily in white vernix, which washed off in the water quickly. He didn’t cry, but his eyes moved very observantly around the room, alert and awake. The most beautiful thing I have ever seen, looking at me, looking at Jeremy as I was the one who wailed; My baby! My baby! You have come, my baby!

Angela, who was wearing a headlamp because it was so dark in the room, remembers Leonardo following her headlamp with his eyes and that she had to turn it off! I am so thankful for Angela’s faith in me and for holding the space with Keryn so beautifully. I got more than what I had set out to gain; from a planned elective caesarean to a home water birth.

A story of transformation

311927_10150379797286061_1912836996_n My birth was truly the most transforming, most empowering thing I have ever done. Leonardo gave me the gift of his birth and it was to change my life completely. Before his birth I worked as a freelance journalist, writing for women’s monthly magazines, including The Oprah Magazine, Fairlady, Longevity and currently, Life Healthcare Magazine. After his birth, I went on to become a Hypnobirthing Childbirth Educator, Hypnotherapist (Essex Institute) and WOMBS Doula and I have never looked back. I created my own hypnobirthing and other relaxation techniques course; Relax Into Birth, which also focused on empowering birth partners for the big day, giving them tools to support the mother through labour and birth.

551166_10151130535526061_1219085074_n This work has given me so much and taught me so much about myself, birth and life. Birth is deep in my heart and I believe I was called to do this work and share what I have learnt with as many women as I can. My birth story and working as a doula has taught me about resilience, flexibility, sacrifice and love and at the most basic level; that women have birth options, that women can trust their bodies and take their power back to birth their babies in the way they want to – free from fear. Birth is a non-medical event, it is about family and intimacy and bonding. It is about power and surrender and letting go. It is about transformation and empowerment and flow. It is about moving through what you never imagined could be possible. Birth is life. Life starts with birth.

The power of each surge

Flows through me

Like water.

Washing off my skin,

Taking my breath away,

Bringing forth life… And

Opening me up.

Stripping away the layers and layers

Of holding back

I leave my body

Surrendering and merging with my baby’s soul

Hovering around me.

Come my love I say…

It’s time. Let’s emerge together…

As a baby is born

A mother is born also.
-By Charlene Yared West

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Pregnancy Awareness Week at one of the best hospitals in town, Life Vincent Pallotti!

February 25, 2018February 26, 2018Leave a comment

Pregnancy Awareness Week takes place annually and this year’s theme was about empowering parents for their journey to birth. I was there representing Relax Into Birth, talking about doula care and relaxation techniques. Many thanks to Sister Lindsay Donnachie, Carline and Vaughanine for arranging such an inspiring event.

Sister Lindsay Donnachie opening the day’s Pregnancy Event.

Sister Donnachie reminded women about their invisible bejeweled crowns on their heads and that no matter how their births turned out – or what turn they took, natural or caesarean, that they would still, no matter what, be the queen of their own births. She emphasised that what really mattered was how the mother viewed her birth and that in order to have a positive experience, she needed to empower herself with information and to know her options. She welcomed all attendees and speakers to the event.

Sister Donnachie reminding mothers to wear their invisible crowns.

Sister Emma Numanoglu of Breastfeeding Matters was first up and is a lactation consultant extraordinairre. Her talk focused on debunking myths around the subject of breastfeeding. Emma’s heart and soul is in her teaching and consulting and those who have been touched by her kindness can attest to that. Nothing is too big or too small – Emma will help you! Did you know that you don’t have to cut out any major food groups while breastfeeding? You don’t have to go gluten free or dairy free (unless medically indicated)! And, did you know there is science behind the use of cabbage leaves for sore, engorged breasts? Also that Jungle Juice is not helpful for anything except a sugar overload and does not help with supply issues… only a good latch can ensure that baby is getting milk… and milk being extracted from the breast helps to increase milk supply. Emma shared these titbits with us and more…

Emma Nummanoglu presenting a breastfeeding talk

Sister Emma Numanoglu presenting a breastfeeding talk.

Next up was Dr Jacky Searle. One of the most gentle, aware and intuitive doctors in Cape Town, her talk focused on choice and birth. She made attendees aware of the choices available in pregnancy and birth and how to navigate the landscape of those choices in Cape Town and within the limitations of medical aids. Practical and always so encouraging, Dr Searle empowers women daily in her work life and beyond. Births with this fine doctor are always Beautiful.

Dr Jacky Searle presenting a talk on choices in the birthing landscape.

I was next in line and my talk was entitled “Empowering women through doula care and relaxation techniques”. Doula care is often misunderstood and so my talk opened with an explanation of the doula role through pregnancy and birth and how it differs from that of a midwife. I also shared some tools for relaxation, excerpted from the Relax Into Birth course.

Attendees trying out some Relax into Birth breathing techniques.

Next up was Liesl Hansen from Johnson and Johnson, who spoke about the benefits of massage in pregnancy, labour and the postnatal period in her talk; “The first touch of love.” When it came to baby massage, she handed out dolls for the parents to practice on, which was just so much fun and so informative! Who doesn’t love a good massage and these parents left feeling equipped to give their babies some extra tlc through massage. She was assisted by Lisa Townend of Holistic Baby – Baby Massage Classes, a certified infant massage instructor.

Liesl Hansen and Lisa Townsend share their learnings around baby massage techniques.

Liesl Hansen and Lisa Townend share their learnings around baby massage techniques.

Last but not least, Jenny Spiro of Nurture One delivered a very interesting talk entitled “Start out right… And sleep tight.” She emphasised the importance of catching the sleep wave to assist your baby to sleep as best as possible. She also showed parents a very clever way of using the amazing Nurture One nesting pillow to put baby to sleep. The pillow cleverly mimics a womb-like environment and gives newborns much comfort.